For two days I have been ringing the council to book for them to collect a big armchair. I even got up extra early to get in first but did not work. I can hum the hold music I know it so well and was doing earlier when breaking for some lunch.
Get in before they shut then and finally at 4.45 today a human voice not a robot spoke to me. Trouble was it made me jump and I nearly cut the call off. Hit the correct button and spoke to him. No he had no idea why it was so hard to contact his department and yes I could have it collected.....at the end of August.
But no he was deadly serious.
I remembered my brother was coming to visit in a few weeks and he has a white van. This cheered up the council man immensely who told me all about the permit he could send me for free. I just needed to give the registration number of the van.
Silence. I have no idea and knew what was coming next.
'Ring back with it' he suggested.
'Noooooooooooooooooooo! Don't make me' I suggested back.
Am now trying to figure out if I know someone with a chainsaw.